


Tevildo's Lament

by havisham



Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Back to Middle-Earth Month, Gen, Melkor's A+ Pet Parenting, Poetry, Sauron Always Loses Sex Toys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-28
Updated: 2015-03-28
Packaged: 2018-03-20 00:04:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3629220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/havisham/pseuds/havisham
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After his humiliation at the hands (and paws) of Lúthien and Huan, Tevildo decides to strike out for himself and has advice for young cats everywhere.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tevildo's Lament

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Suzelle](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Suzelle/gifts).



> Written for Back to Middle-Earth Month 2015, for the prompt [The Thieving Cat](http://b2mem.livejournal.com/284221.html?thread=4817469#t4817469). (Please click through to the image. It's slightly NSFW, but worth your time.)

I once was a kitten, as white as snow,   
Verily, I lifted up my eyes from my basket,   
And my fearsome Master did I spy,   
And with warm approval did he glow.  
He sat me on a overflowing jewel casket,   
And declared the chiefest of treasures was I! 

His Servant sniffed in disapproval,  
And cast upon me an evil eye,   
For once he too was so favored,   
Muttering his Master loved all that was novel,  
But I thought this was a lie,  
And for my Master’s love I long labored. 

As a youth I fought many a battle,   
Lost a part of my tail, gained a sinister air,   
My fur took on a sooty cast, in the shadow,   
I bested the best, tested my mettle,  
Stole a choice bit of meat from the Servant’s Lair,   
Indeed, it was one of his most favorite Parts, hey-o! 

My Master was well-pleased with my offering,  
He petted me, called me his most favorite pet.   
The Servant raced in, shouting, "Felonious fleabag!"   
Satisfied, I purred at the face of his glowering,  
Curled up in my Master's lap, a little coquette.   
He muttered that my comeuppance would not lag.

Now I was in charge of a castle, full of many cats,   
All of whom hailed me as their Prince,   
And I was beloved by them, hailed,   
As Tevildo the Black, Prince of Cats!   
Black dread struck all who saw my prints,   
O my paws, for catching and keeping, they never failed! 

But alas, all such great happiness must end,  
And my doom was struck when I took pity,   
On a pathetic Boy, sniveling and sneezing,   
And I ate him not, but to the kitchens I did him send,   
To wash our dirty milk-bowls, enough to fill a city.   
Then I forgot about him, as I did all things unpleasing.

But then She came, and brought with her the Dog,   
My fur rises now, to think of them both, her and him,   
"Let Beren go!" She shouted and the Dog growled,   
"You mean that fool of a kitchen boy?" I asked, all agog.   
But we needed a kitchen boy, however dim!   
Alas, my attempt at urbane wit was wholly fouled. 

The Dog sprang and I unsheathed my claws,   
My amusement turning sour and hard.   
We fought, tooth to sinew, and oh! What a foe!   
There was honor in him, deeper than laws,   
I flagged, my side gored by long, wicked shard,  
Of glass, and thus I was brought low. 

I begged for peace with his detestable teeth on my neck,   
And agreed to free the kitchen-boy. Not content,   
She threw down my walls and freed the thralls.   
Not a shred of pity did they give me, not a fleck,   
They put a collar on me, of metal burned and bent,   
And bade me go back to my Master's halls. 

I did, with my tail dragging behind me,   
And the Servant waited for me, an unpleasant smile on his face,   
"What's this around your neck, O mighty Tevildo, Prince of Cats?"   
I glared up at him, my oldest enemy,   
to him, I said, "Smile not, for one day you will be in my place!"   
He laughed and said, "Goodbye, Tevildo. I’ll miss our little chats." 

Then my summons came, to meet my Master,   
I cannot tell you what he said to me, or what he did,   
Know only that he broke the collar around my neck,   
And I fled his halls, my feet never faster,   
Far did I go, wailing like a soon-to-be-sacrificed kid,   
No matter, my heart was a wreck.

O cats of Arda, listen to one who was once your Prince,   
In these later days, there are many who would fawn,   
Over you and yours -- but beware!   
Let none be the Master of you, hence,   
For their hearts are weak, uncertain as the dawn,   
Be your own Master and save yourself a world of care!


End file.
